This post was to introduce newbies to George.  Impressive diver, but he chooses to be a real pain on the lists.


Date:  Aug 31, 1997

George, this pattern of yours is a riot.

NEWBIE GUIDE TO GEORGE

Characteristic 1:
Accusations of nameless individuals. This is an especially great tactic. Make a blanket derogatory comment, while knowing that it's unlikely that anybody is going to pipe up and say, "Hey, I'm the reject George speaks of. I want to defend myself." Even if a group of people are covered in the statement, nobody feels like taking the heat alone. Besides, it's pretty well established that the mind of George can't be changed as a result of an argument on here.

Characteristic 2:
Implying facts without backing them up. "This is the way it is, you'll see someday." The "facts" usually rely on information that can not be gained easily. Especially note any posts that refer to the military guys who are supposedly on here, but never voice a single opinion to back up anything George says. This characteristic also covers deliberate withholding of information until his competitors are out of the way. Yeah, whatever.

Characteristic 3:
Everybody is a stroke, except for WKPP members and maybe 10 other people. Note that strokehood is automatically granted to anybody on this list, or any other diving related list, so don't take it personal.

Characteristic 4:
The Halcyon is the only safe rig except for open circuit. Do not argue, do not pass go, do not collect $200. Any mention of any other rebreather will usually elicit the "usual suspects" clause, and perhaps even the "known liars" statement. Electronics are EVIL!!!! George has been trying to figure out why most of the electronic rebreather guys haven't died yet.

Characteristic 5:
Cave diving to 300 feet, for at least 70 minutes bottom time and way back in a cave system is the only real diving. Sorry to have to break it to you that you don't really dive. According to George, you guys are jerking off. Cross reference: stroke. Also, make a note that you may also be bounce diving if you reach 300 feet but stay there less than an hour.

Characteristic 6:
Profanity for kicks, and promises of acts that would make porn stars blush.

Characteristic 7:
If you say anything bad about George, or the Halcyon, you will get "The Treatment". This will involve any or all of the following statements:
mutant, liar, sack of sh*t, moron, misinformed, Bone-Smuggler, ignorant, assh*le, dumb, clueless, stroke, Bioweenies, clown, stupid, neophyte, technophile, pot-smoking, beer-swilling, clueless, failure, crap, trash, talkers, suck, geek, bozo, Slobitis, self-evident joke, dilettante, nutcase, strokefest. . .
you get the picture.


Now, Mr. Newbie, if you ignore any paragraph by George that has any of the above characteristics, you will find that George usually knows what he is talking about. He is not a bad person, just acidic. Heck, if you ignore these online characteristics, you might even *like* him. This guide works for me. Give it a try, it makes the rebreather list, and George, much more enjoyable.

Best regards,